I got married! Appreciation thread!

[Infected]

Congratulations @(you need an account to see links) what wonderful news, I wish you two all the happiness and success in your relationship.

- Don't seek fairness.

- "Begin with the end in mind"

- Do what you must, to make things work (even if its not what others might do or might seem unnatural!)

I have had friends mock our 'way' of dealing with problems, saying that it takes too much effort and sounds unnatural. I agree, it takes effort and isn't for everyone but it works for us. Whatever it takes for you and your partner, is right.

I wish you all the best in your relationship!

Thank you so much! That's such amazing advice, not even just for married folk here, but for relationships in general! The first two points especially are the foundation of a healthy relationship!

This seems so foreign to me. I grew up in a broken home. My parents were divorced and my father was toxic and my mother was absent.

So just going off my own beliefs I've always been opened about everything. We don't hide our phones or browser history.
We both know all our passwords. If anything happens to me I'd want him to be able to handle things.

With that we've had joint banking accounts since we got married.

We both worked but we moved to a small town where I was the only one working for the majority of the time we've lived here.

He is better with making sure things get paid on time. So he's managed all our finances from the beginning.

I've only recently heard of people not sharing accounts in my line of work. I thought it was because most wifes in our line of work dont work. So it's interesting to see other people with this opinion not in my line of work.

I think if it works for you great. Money has never been an issue in our relationship. I feel like that's mainly due to communication.
But it's nice to read everyone's advice here!

Thank you! This is great. I'm so happy I started this topic because people are drawing advice from their own experiences with their partners, and some things are small some are big, and all are really useful and invaluable to anyone in a marriage or relationship - new or old! Thank you for sharing.

Congratulations on getting married @(you need an account to see links)! It sounds like you guys had an amazing day! My hubby and I will be coming up on 10 years of marriage next spring! *eek that went fast!*

So tips on marriage. Well it takes work haha as cliche as it sounds. It will also be a roller coaster ride. And from my experience, to make that roller coaster more enjoyable it takes some of these things

It's normal to go through lulls and slumps in any relationship and this still happens when you get married. It's how you get through it together that makes the relationship. Skeep things alive and make lots of date nights so you can focus on eachother and reconnecting.

I hope this was helpful as I feel like I'm keyboard spewing, but this is what I can share from my own experience.

Most importantly have fun!

Congratulations again!

Thank you so much! That actually was one of my fears about marriage, about going through a slump and finding ways to keep it interesting. I think it's inevitable, but glad to know that it's a normal part of marriage!

Congrats on your marriage! Married life is awesome
I am almost two years married to my soul mate, we have been together coming up six years.
He is my rock, and such a goofball.
He comes to almost every single hockey game (unless sick or working) and is always there cheering me on. He warms my heart.

I had weight loss surgery over a year ago and he has been so supportive, and helpful to get my life on track.
We race cars together, game together, and have two fur babies.

My one tip would be communicate, be open with all feelings happy or sad and make sure you are always on the same page.
Try not to go to bed angry and sort as much as you can that day!

Thank you for the wishes and for sharing! That's absolutely beautiful! I'm so happy for you that you have found the one, and it's beautiful to hear stories like yours.

[Hawking]

Congratulations!

My wife and I have been married for 3 years in July. We were friends for almost 5 years before we ever started dating, so we went into the relationship already knowing each other super well. Being married to my best friend is awesome.

My advice:
1) Remember that its not always going to be easy. There are days where we drive each other crazy or disagree on something. Sometimes you're going to be on different pages and that's okay. Marriage is about understanding each other and getting back to the common ground. It's all about how you get there. You married each other for a reason.

2) Get on the same page about finances immediately. I'm a budget guy, my wife is more of a "figure it out" kind of person. Our solution is that we each maintained our personal accounts, but we opened a joint account that we use to pay for our house costs. I made about 3x what she makes, so I contribute 3x as much. Our mortgage/internet/electric/water etc all come directly out of that account and then we do as we see fit with our own money. Resentment over finances is one of the quickest ways to end a marriage.

3) Keep dating. Just because you're married and have a ring on your finger doesn't mean that you don't need to keep trying to win your partner's affection every single day. Grab flowers on the way home, leave a note in their lunch, send that "I miss you" text while you're at work, grab a bottle of wine and build a pillow fort. Push every day to keep the butterflies fluttering.

Again, congratulations!

[Infected]

Congratulations!

My wife and I have been married for 3 years in July. We were friends for almost 5 years before we ever started dating, so we went into the relationship already knowing each other super well. Being married to my best friend is awesome.

My advice:
1) Remember that its not always going to be easy. There are days where we drive each other crazy or disagree on something. Sometimes you're going to be on different pages and that's okay. Marriage is about understanding each other and getting back to the common ground. It's all about how you get there. You married each other for a reason.

2) Get on the same page about finances immediately. I'm a budget guy, my wife is more of a "figure it out" kind of person. Our solution is that we each maintained our personal accounts, but we opened a joint account that we use to pay for our house costs. I made about 3x what she makes, so I contribute 3x as much. Our mortgage/internet/electric/water etc all come directly out of that account and then we do as we see fit with our own money. Resentment over finances is one of the quickest ways to end a marriage.

3) Keep dating. Just because you're married and have a ring on your finger doesn't mean that you don't need to keep trying to win your partner's affection every single day. Grab flowers on the way home, leave a note in their lunch, send that "I miss you" text while you're at work, grab a bottle of wine and build a pillow fort. Push every day to keep the butterflies fluttering.

Again, congratulations!

Thank you! That's awesome advice! Especially the last point. Even when we were just dating its easy to get complacent and set in a routine of just hanging at home, watching and eating stuff, and getting lazy. We've kind of made a point to go out on dates and if we're too lazy, still just go down to the bar or have a night of drinks just in the house, and we get some nice take out! I feel like it's important to keep that spark alive too.

[Tyranitar]

So as I mentioned in a post here, I got married! I took some time off of my internet life for a couple of months, and we had a beautiful wedding in the first week of June! It was a small and intimate ceremony with 75 of our closest family and friends. A lot of people I spoke to told me mixed things about marriage, but generally all good haha.

But for me, this is the one person in the world who understands me and gets me and she makes me happy! I've known her 5 years, and it sounds silly, but since I've met her, I moved to a great job that I love and pays me well, I made some good business decisions that ended up being profitable, my health is better, and I feel great! It's like she was the one lucky charm I needed to get my life in order, and I wouldn't have it any other way. And I can't wait to live the rest of my life together with her.

There's a lot of married people on here, so what are your tips for a successful marriage? Or share with us an anecdote about why you appreciate your spouse maybe? Or those who are engaged, or about to be married soon, what are your stories?

Congratulations!!!
A lot of people likes to joke and say that you should never get married or something like that. I hate when they joke like that.
I think a lot of people have a difficult marriage because they don't really like to share their life, or to put a little bit of effort into things.

I have been married for almost 2 years now and I absolutely love it!
My wife is my soul mate, we never never never fight. We do have discussions but they're because we share those things that annoys us and we always try to be better.
I mean, I was that kind of guy that never makes the bed, but she likes the bed make after we woke up, so now I always do that for her, because I know she likes it and appreciates my effort.
Also, she always recognize my efforts and I love that! I feel appreciated. Whenever I cook or wash the dishes she thanks me, and hey I do that everyday!

For me, marriage is the best thing that ever happened to me. I love to be with her, to make things for her and to be a lovely couple.

Congratulations again!

[TsUNaMy WaVe]

That's amazing! Congratulations!
I'm really happy for you

[Cat Purrson]

Oh congrats!!! Me and my fiancé are getting married on July 17th and I am so excited!!! He proposed to me last year at Universal Studios in front of my family (which was a big deal to me because I don't get to see my family very often so it was very special) Did you honeymoon anywhere fun?

[Infected]

Oh congrats!!! Me and my fiancé are getting married on July 17th and I am so excited!!! He proposed to me last year at Universal Studios in front of my family (which was a big deal to me because I don't get to see my family very often so it was very special) Did you honeymoon anywhere fun?

Congratulations! That's so exciting! Hope you both have a fantastic wedding - and don't worry too much everything goes to plan amazingly. That sounds like an amazing and thoughtful proposal too!

We did a honeymoon trip to Mauritius and then to Dubai, and are currently in India, and will soon be back home in 3 days. So yeah long honeymoon, but with our schedules we probably won't get to travel together till atleast 2025 so it was worth it!

[Tyranitar]

Oh congrats!!! Me and my fiancé are getting married on July 17th and I am so excited!!! He proposed to me last year at Universal Studios in front of my family (which was a big deal to me because I don't get to see my family very often so it was very special) Did you honeymoon anywhere fun?

Wow, that's so soon!
I wish you all the best luck, laughs and love!
The wedding day can be very stressful, but I recommend you to relax and enjoy. Even if something bad happens, just look to the other side and keep dancing.

----
I have a question, how are weedings where you live?
This is a question for everybody.

I know that in some places, a wedding is just a small ceremony wit family and friends, some food and that's all.
In Mexico, a wedding is a VERY BIG party, with ceremony, food, drinks and a very big dance floor where you are going to dance all night.
My wedding started at 6pm and ended at 4am.

[Infected]

Wow, that's so soon!
I wish you all the best luck, laughs and love!
The wedding day can be very stressful, but I recommend you to relax and enjoy. Even if something bad happens, just look to the other side and keep dancing.

----
I have a question, how are weedings where you live?
This is a question for everybody.

I know that in some places, a wedding is just a small ceremony wit family and friends, some food and that's all.
In Mexico, a wedding is a VERY BIG party, with ceremony, food, drinks and a very big dance floor where you are going to dance all night.
My wedding started at 6pm and ended at 4am.

I'm Indian, she's British. Indian weddings actually are huge - like 300-400 people and go on for 2-3 days, and there's lots of singing and dancing and partying. But we're both more intimate kind of people and wanted an exclusive and small wedding.
In comparison my sister's wedding was a 3 day celebration that was attended by 400 people. I literally needed a break after the wedding to recover haha.

[Tyranitar]

I'm Indian, she's British. Indian weddings actually are huge - like 300-400 people and go on for 2-3 days, and there's lots of singing and dancing and partying. But we're both more intimate kind of people and wanted an exclusive and small wedding.
In comparison my sister's wedding was a 3 day celebration that was attended by 400 people. I literally needed a break after the wedding to recover haha.

(you need an account to see links)

Wow! 3 days? How? What do you do?
Do you need to provide food for everyone all those days? Do you rest?