Need to get something off my chest

[hellraid]

It doesn’t matter the type of alcohol you drink, or how often you drink it. It really comes down to the amount you’re drinking.

A lot of people don’t consider binge drinking to be alcoholism, but it is. There is plenty of research and documentaries about the danger of binge drinking and the prevalence of binge drinking in modern society (perfect example: “wine mom” culture). The hardest part is admitting there may be a problem in the first place as many people often are stuck in the denial stage or the “well no there’s people who actually have drinking problems, mine isn’t that bad” kind of mindset.

Hopefully you can work towards recovery, however that may look for you.

Well then I am totally screwed, then I just need to adjust somehow I guess. Need to find a way to deal with this. Thanks <3

[Alcremie]

Problem is that I am still hiding it (to most of the people I know, not all of them) But yeah I do tend to hide some of it because I know it's wrong. I did manage to stay clean for like a month or two. But my family is also very like it's weekend lets have a few drinks. I also have a very easy time to get addicted to stuff. I used to be a smoker, finally kicked that habbit. Not because I wanted to, but because I had to. So maybe I can do that with this as well

Oh yeah, the isolation part is killer. We had to keep my bro away from the rest of the family and not have wine at gatherings, etc. It's not easy on anyone especially the person that needs help. But not everyone needs to know either. Sometimes (toxic) people use it against you.

[Cinnamoroll]

Well then I am totally screwed, then I just need to adjust somehow I guess. Need to find a way to deal with this. Thanks <3

I wouldn’t say you’re “totally screwed”, it’s more just being cognisant of drinking patterns. Some people can casually have a few drinks on the weekend. But there are many who simply cannot. I won’t delve into huge details but someone close in my life struggled with binge drinking and cocaine addiction. The alcohol brought on fake confidence and then fuelled the cocaine. It wasn’t pretty. And this person was hiding it more and more. The drinking, not necessarily, but hiding the cocaine, yes. It got to the point where every time they drank, they’d be black out drunk and they’d be doing cocaine at work, at home, and at parties. People had staged an intervention for her and it didn’t go well. She rebelled and cut ties with people who wanted to help, and that pushed her to near rock bottom. Unfortunately, it took her hitting that point to realise if she didn’t make a change, she would lose everything. Its been a few years now, but she has not gone back to drinking or using hard drugs. There were some points where she slipped up and used some “lighter” drugs (for lack of a better term) but she didn’t hold it against herself. Recovery is not a linear process and that is okay.

I know you had said you didn’t want advice, but as someone whose been on the receiving end of someone battling alcoholism: you need to be honest with the people around you and you can’t hide this from them. They need to know so they can help you come out the other end of it. Hiding it from them will only hurt you and them too.

Also to address people drinking around you: your comfort level of being around alcohol will be up to you. It cannot be completely avoided in public places like restaurants or weddings for example. But with family or friends it can be to a degree. If you are in a place where you don’t want people around you drinking, simply tell them. If they have an issue with it, create the boundary that you cannot spend time around them if they are drinking. For others, once you get to a point where you think you can tolerate people drinking around you, all you have to do is simply say, “thank you, but I don’t drink” and leave it at that. They should respect it and if they don’t, then I would again question the relationship and create boundaries.

[Teakwood]

I'm always here if you need someone to talk to man. Always a message away, a phone call, whatever the case may be. Please never feel like you cannot talk to me about anything. I will always lend an ear to hear what you have to say <3

[hellraid]

I'm always here if you need someone to talk to man. Always a message away, a phone call, whatever the case may be. Please never feel like you cannot talk to me about anything. I will always lend an ear to hear what you have to say <3

I know Kev, I am not even sure why I never reached out before. We've known eachother for the longest time. Thank you <3

And thank everyone else who is actually taking their time to respond. I want to reply to every message. It's just difficult finding the words on how to respond.

[Crooked]

Denial and shame are two of the biggest things that keep people trapped in their addictions. The fact that you are aware that your drinking is problematic is huge, as is being vulnerable with us by making this thread. Addiction is something that almost everyone struggles with, whether it be their own or that of a loved one. It’s nothing to be ashamed about. I won’t offer any unsolicited advice, but you’re definitely not alone. There are lots of communities, online and offline, dedicated to coping with alcoholism. If telling people you know personally is too daunting, those places may be a good start for seeking support.

Thank you for opening up and trusting us here. 💙 You don’t need to reply to this if replying is overwhelming. Wishing you nothing but the best.

[hellraid]

Denial and shame are two of the biggest things that keep people trapped in their addictions. The fact that you are aware that your drinking is problematic is huge, as is being vulnerable with us by making this thread. Addiction is something that almost everyone struggles with, whether it be their own or that of a loved one. It’s nothing to be ashamed about. I won’t offer any unsolicited advice, but you’re definitely not alone. There are lots of communities, online and offline, dedicated to coping with alcoholism. If telling people you know personally is too daunting, those places may be a good start for seeking support.

Thank you for opening up and trusting us here. 💙 You don’t need to reply to this if replying is overwhelming. Wishing you nothing but the best.

It's weird, I am not really in denial because I know what I do is wrong. But I keep doing it anyway, so I am kind of in denial anyway. Addictions is a huge problem for me. Sometimes is can actually be great. Sometimes, like in this case, it's kind of not. I am a person that tend to make jokes about things when they get bad. Guess that's my way to cope. I appreciate your post, thank you <3 wishing you the best as well!

[birdies]

It's weird, I am not really in denial because I know what I do is wrong. But I keep doing it anyway, so I am kind of in denial anyway. Addictions is a huge problem for me. Sometimes is can actually be great. Sometimes, like in this case, it's kind of not. I am a person that tend to make jokes about things when they get bad. Guess that's my way to cope. I appreciate your post, thank you <3 wishing you the best as well!

I understand this sentiment. I don't have a problem with alcohol - one of my parents was a high functioning alcoholic and I think that completely put me off alcohol - but I know I do have a very addictive personality and I have to be careful around lots of things. Even things as prevalent as sugar and video games. When I've found myself getting addicted to things in the past I've known it was wrong and stupid but it took me a long time to go cold turkey.

Based on my own family experiences, you might think you're hiding it better than you are. Or if you are hiding it, there might be aspects of your personality it's affecting that other people will notice as an issue even if they don't know why. I know it could be difficult living with an alcoholic, even an extremely high functioning one.

There's no shame in it, this stuff is designed to get us addicted. But it does seem like it's something you need to find a way to kick, and admitting this here is a brave thing to do and a good first step.