What helps you fall asleep?

[Cat Purrson]

I’ve struggled with falling asleep when I lay in bed and often find myself tossing and turning throughout the night Meanwhile my boyfriend can fall asleep as soon as he hits the pillow. What are some things you do to help fall asleep faster in bed?

[♥ honeycomb ♥]

i used to have (and still struggle with) really bad insomnia and horrible sleep habits. it got to the point to where i was sleeping maybe 2-3 hours a night. had to go see a specialist about it and she made me do some Rigorous sleep hygiene.

the main things she mentioned were:
- no caffeine after noon
- going to bed at the same time NO MATTER WHAT (and staying there even if you dont sleep)
- waking up at the same time (even if you barely slept)
- doing something calming for the 45 mins before bedtime (yoga, coloring, crafting, whatever)
- no screens before bed!!!!!

you have to stick to it though, it sucks. but my sleep was fixed within a week and i was sleeping properly without waking up a bunch in the middle of the night.

though IF you dont wanna do that, i recommend drinking sleepytime tea before bed - or trying melatonin if you havnt already.

[Dark_dragonz]

I've always found myself in a similar situation to yours - usually when I can't stop thinking about something. You then tell your brain to stop thinking, which makes it worse! I've found the following things helpful:
- avoid eating and drinking fluids at least 2-3 hours before bed to prevent waking up at night
- put away your devices 30 mins before bed
- read a book before bed (it's a stress reliever and takes your mind off other things)

Some other things that have helped me in the past that are partially contradictory to my second bullet point:
- listening to an audiobook
- listening to relaxing music

My go-to music for sleep:

[Serebii]

My cat hopping up into bed with me and nuzzling into the crook of my arm never fails to knock me out, especially once she starts getting that motor going.

Otherwise, I had a lot of trouble falling asleep until I actually looked into... pillows. Yeah, actual comfortable pillows. It's amazing how fast you'll fall asleep when you're not tossing and turning struggling to get into that "just right" position. Even better if you're sleeping with a partner and they tend to take all the pillows you used to own because they need one for their neck, between their legs AND to cuddle on. Like c'mon, that's 3 of the 4 we had!

[Cat Purrson]

i used to have (and still struggle with) really bad insomnia and horrible sleep habits. it got to the point to where i was sleeping maybe 2-3 hours a night. had to go see a specialist about it and she made me do some Rigorous sleep hygiene.

the main things she mentioned were:
- no caffeine after noon
- going to bed at the same time NO MATTER WHAT (and staying there even if you dont sleep)
- waking up at the same time (even if you barely slept)
- doing something calming for the 45 mins before bedtime (yoga, coloring, crafting, whatever)
- no screens before bed!!!!!

you have to stick to it though, it sucks. but my sleep was fixed within a week and i was sleeping properly without waking up a bunch in the middle of the night.

though IF you dont wanna do that, i recommend drinking sleepytime tea before bed - or trying melatonin if you havnt already.

Thank you that is very helpful!! I’m definitely going to start trying some of these tips because I’m absolutely not getting enough sleep lately and it’s affecting on my mental health. The caffeine one is definitely going to be hard but my addiction to tiktok will be my ultimate downfall. I’ll get on that app at night and then next thing I know the sun is rising and I’ve fucked up. I have tried sleepy time medicine but it always leaves me feeling so groggy and even more tired when I wake up so I try to avoid them if I can. I’d eventually like to train myself to sleep as soon as I hit the pillow.

[kittyray]

I also have chronic/clinical insomnia, and at times also had delayed sleep phase issues. At my worst on I was sleeping a couple hours every other night (at best) and then every few days just collapsing and being dead to the world for practically an entire day. The exceptions to this were when I was physically active for most of my waking hours, then I could get on a more normal schedule, but it isn't really realistic.

I saw a specialist when some other things started getting bad, did a sleep study and everything, and my rules were pretty similar to honeycomb.

- figure out your caffeine cutoff point and stick to it (noon is a good bet, but 1:00 worked for me)
- cut off food at a certain point as well (usually a few hours before bed)
- if you live in a space that allows for it, no screens in the bedroom at all, if you like to use laptop/tablet/whatever late at night, keep it to the kitchen/living room, if you live in a studio, try not to do it while sitting on the bed
- try to limit the bedroom to sleeping (and ahem bedroom activities), if possible. Don't read, fold laundry, watch TV. If you live in a studio, try to block off the view of the bed for when you're doing these things.
- If you take medication, stick to a schedule. For me this was melatonin at a certain point, and a stronger Rx medication a couple hours later. I also found a schedule that worked for me about what I could/couldn't do after taking each.
- Keep media to brainless (or maybe familiar) things after a certain point. Definitely not the stuff that gets you thinking and theorizing, but also maybe avoid the so-bad-it's-hilarious stuff that makes your brain go "now why the fuck would...". After my screen cutoff time, this applied to reading, too. I was living with my parents when this first started, so I revisited a lot of middle-school era books.
- Wear those orange-tinted blue blocking glasses at night. It has the benefits of things like f.lux except it applies to the way you see the world. Sounds tacky, but it helps.
- This deviates from honeycomb a bit, but if you've found yourself in bed for like an hour and still haven't slept. Get up and do something simple for about twenty minutes to try to reset, then head back to bed.

I'm probably forgetting things, but this is what comes to mind.

[Peanutface]

I learned many years ago, after a personal tragedy, what works best for me. NEVER get into bed until you are really tired. So I will stay up, in another room and most of the time I am reading. Nothing that stimulates to much. No action movies. This quiet time for me does the trick all the time. If you do get into bed and are tossing and turning, LEAVE. You never want to associate your bedroom with a place that is not restful.
Hope this is of usefulness.

[Ghast]

Everyone else has some fantastic input, I am on the same page with everything that has been stated

Two other things that also help me are listening to brown noise (or white noise), and using a fan or AC unit.

I have a lot going on in my life and my thoughts are often clouded, especially at night. It can be really easy to feel like I am spiraling and not only does it keep me up, but it also affects the way I sleep once I finally hit that point. Brown noise is essentially designed to distract you from those spiraling thoughts, I think it helps scramble the brain in a way. I personally use "Brown Noise for Sleep" by Sounds of Life, and White Noise 1-3 Hour Long by Erik Eriksson, both on Spotify. I keep mine on for only an hour or so, but some people use it all night long.

Another point is keeping your room cool - this of course depends on if you are someone who gets hot/warm when you sleep, but it can help while trying to fall asleep initially to get comfortable, otherwise you will be tossing and turning trying to figure out how to position your body so you feel the right temperature.

One last thing I can maybe recommend if you are struggling to feel like you are getting good quality sleep is working with sleep cycles. Each sleep cycle is 90 minutes long and helps you hit REM, and you can calculate a bed time and wake time that puts in to account sleep cycles and helps you get a desired amount of sleep within those cycles.

(you need an account to see links)


Overall, it definitely is about trial and error for a few weeks until you find out what is just perfect for you. Sometimes you may need to revisit it too, one thing may work for a few months then you may find you need to try something new. I hope you get good rest!

[phantasia]

Don't laugh. I think about what I would do if I won the lotto. I have plans for different amounts and I like going through those plans in my head.

I actually find that drinking coffee or caffeine has no effect on how easily I fall asleep.
I agree that waiting till you are really tired helps
Never thought pillows would have such a big influence.

[♥ pillowfighter ♥]

Don't laugh. I think about what I would do if I won the lotto. I have plans for different amounts and I like going through those plans in my head.

I actually find that drinking coffee or caffeine has no effect on how easily I fall asleep.
I agree that waiting till you are really tired helps
Never thought pillows would have such a big influence.

Oh my goodness I totally feel this
The, “just let me win 10k off of a scratch card…I’ll pay this bill and that bill and put money towards a house….or maybe 15k..”
I do this to fall asleep too sometimes!