Anxiety (How do you deal?)

[motherfucker]

Also, sometimes a breakdown is good. I have one at least monthly. I have a sad playlist specifically meant for it. To just sob and let go of things.

I'm pretty close today. I feel super fragile... It's weird to be conscious of it.

[Goddammit]

I smoke weed. It has an added benefit for me too, I'm diagnosed as generalized anxiety disorder with insomnia induced anxiety. Basically I'm a big ball of anxiousness. Not only does smoking help me chill the fuck out, it helps me sleep at night too.

I was on medications and I do have a pysch doctor, but I was sick of having to trial and error meds and feeling sick every time so I just weaned off them. I still see my pysch doctor. IMPORTANT: IF YOU (ie anyone reading this) ARE ON PRESCRIPTION MEDS, DO NOT STOP TAKING THEM COLD TURKEY. It can really fuck you up. It took some time to find a doctor I meshed well with and it was really hard for me to get into the habit of actually talking and explaining things to her. Ive been through some shit and dont like talking about a lot of it. But a good doctor knows how to make you feel comfortable and get you talking. I truly believed my doctor saved my life. Two and a half years of seeing her and she's awesome.

For some people, weed doesn't help. It makes both my sister and my boyfriend anxious/paranoid, so they dont smoke. But honestly, its always helped me better than any med I've been on. DISCLAIMER: Thats not to say I think medication isnt useful. It is. I have friends who I dont think would be with us if they werent on meds. Alternatively, my best friend is no longer with us because he stopped taking his meds and his doctors were shit at trying to find the right ones for him.

Other methods: I keep a journal. I have religiously kept one since I was 14. If you find it hard to articulate yourself verbally, writing it out can help. Even if you find it hard to write at first, getting things out of your head and onto paper can be like a weight is lifted off your chest. I also draw. It doesnt help get through the anxiety but when I'm a mess, it distracts me bc I have to pay attention to what I am doing and it helps alleviate it. Anything can be good for this, I also play video games. Video games are good bc it lets you feel like youre in control of something when you might otherwise feel like youre not. Basically, doing something that requires you to shift your focus can be helpful in getting through the attack.

And when all else fails, I take a hot bubble bath, throw in a bath bomb, put on a face mask (basically pampering yourself) and listen to music. Sometimes it results in me sitting in there and crying (damn this sounds really pathetic... but in my defense a good cry can sometimes work wonders so whateva) but most of the time if I concentrate on my breathing and the music, it helps calm me down.

Sorry for the giant novel. But I'm 30 years old and have been a high strung anxious trash fire since I was a kid. I hope some of this advice helps you. Anxiety fucking sucks and its all about finding out what works for YOU to combat it.

Sent from my SM-G955U using Tapatalk

---------- Post added at 09:10 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:08 PM ----------

Also, sometimes a breakdown is good. I have one at least monthly. I have a sad playlist specifically meant for it. To just sob and let go of things.

I am so glad I am not the only one who does this. My sad song playlist is the bomb when I need to have a good ugly cry.

Sent from my SM-G955U using Tapatalk

[Midas]

Not pretty sure how can I advise you.
I'm a smoker, but I don't recommend that. Avoid that, if you can.
Do you exercise? I'm a swimmer, and that helps a lot.

Don't be scared about the future. Changes are good, life is about it.
Nothing lasts forever.

Fly away if it's time to.
Laugh, cry if you want to.
There is a full spectre of feelings you can ride through.
We are always good enough for the right people.
You've come too far, and everything you already got is thanks to your hard work.

Keep it on!
Just message me if you need to talk♥

[motherfucker]

I smoke weed. It has an added benefit for me too, I'm diagnosed as generalized anxiety disorder with insomnia induced anxiety. Basically I'm a big ball of anxiousness. Not only does smoking help me chill the fuck out, it helps me sleep at night too.

I was on medications and I do have a pysch doctor, but I was sick of having to trial and error meds and feeling sick every time so I just weaned off them. I still see my pysch doctor. IMPORTANT: IF YOU (ie anyone reading this) ARE ON PRESCRIPTION MEDS, DO NOT STOP TAKING THEM COLD TURKEY. It can really fuck you up. It took some time to find a doctor I meshed well with and it was really hard for me to get into the habit of actually talking and explaining things to her. Ive been through some shit and dont like talking about a lot of it. But a good doctor knows how to make you feel comfortable and get you talking. I truly believed my doctor saved my life. Two and a half years of seeing her and she's awesome.

For some people, weed doesn't help. It makes both my sister and my boyfriend anxious/paranoid, so they dont smoke. But honestly, its always helped me better than any med I've been on. DISCLAIMER: Thats not to say I think medication isnt useful. It is. I have friends who I dont think would be with us if they werent on meds. Alternatively, my best friend is no longer with us because he stopped taking his meds and his doctors were shit at trying to find the right ones for him.

Other methods: I keep a journal. I have religiously kept one since I was 14. If you find it hard to articulate yourself verbally, writing it out can help. Even if you find it hard to write at first, getting things out of your head and onto paper can be like a weight is lifted off your chest. I also draw. It doesnt help get through the anxiety but when I'm a mess, it distracts me bc I have to pay attention to what I am doing and it helps alleviate it. Anything can be good for this, I also play video games. Video games are good bc it lets you feel like youre in control of something when you might otherwise feel like youre not. Basically, doing something that requires you to shift your focus can be helpful in getting through the attack.

And when all else fails, I take a hot bubble bath, throw in a bath bomb, put on a face mask (basically pampering yourself) and listen to music. Sometimes it results in me sitting in there and crying (damn this sounds really pathetic... but in my defense a good cry can sometimes work wonders so whateva) but most of the time if I concentrate on my breathing and the music, it helps calm me down.

Sorry for the giant novel. But I'm 30 years old and have been a high strung anxious trash fire since I was a kid. I hope some of this advice helps you. Anxiety fucking sucks and its all about finding out what works for YOU to combat it.

Sent from my SM-G955U using Tapatalk

---------- Post added at 09:10 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:08 PM ----------

I am so glad I am not the only one who does this. My sad song playlist is the bomb when I need to have a good ugly cry.

Sent from my SM-G955U using Tapatalk

Thank you for reaching out.
I love the self care side of things, so that's a very good idea.

I recently bought Pokemon Gold on my 3ds virtual console, so I'm hoping that can help distract me.
I would say that the video games thing is applicable to me. I think that's why I've liked Neopets. I can be completely in control of my whole account.

[Goddammit]

Thank you for reaching out.
I love the self care side of things, so that's a very good idea.

I recently bought Pokemon Gold on my 3ds virtual console, so I'm hoping that can help distract me.
I would say that the video games thing is applicable to me. I think that's why I've liked Neopets. I can be completely in control of my whole account.

The important thing is to remember that it always passes. Thats the mantra. Nothing is forever, not even this awful feeling. I know in the moment sometimes (a lot of the time) it isnt necessarily helpful. Just remind yourself to breathe. If you can breathe for ten seconds, you can breathe for twenty. If you can breathe for twenty, you can breathe for thirty. Breathing exercises can help a lot too.

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[motherfucker]

The more I delve into my feelings, the more I see this all as stemming from my relationship. It's all insecurities and fear of rejection.

I wouldn't say I'm anti-social, but I like my alone time. I would LOVE to be more social, but sometimes it's hard for me.

When we first started dating, he said he was the same way, but I've come to find that it's the opposite. He's always off with other people, meeting for coffee, hanging out, doing things. I believe it causes a lot of jealousy, because I wish I could bring myself to do stuff like that, and as well, I want him to do stuff like that with me. I think these feelings of jealousy make me feel rejected because I'm not being included and feel left out.

I have some mean FOMO.

[ruzzeh]

I'm a super anxious person. Well I used to be, I still kinda am but significantly less so.
I went from being someone who would get physically sick walking into a grocery store to working a high stress job that involves life/death.
There are lots of factors to anxiety, and controlling it.
What helps me significantly is breaking down and realizing what anxiety is.

Anxiety is your fight or flight response, the same feeling you'd get if you were being chased by a lion. Your heart races to provide more oxygen to your body to prepare you to run/fight, your pupils dilate so your line of vision increases, you become hyper aware to your surroundings, to protect yourself from threats.
The only problem is- your body is misfiring. You're not in danger, you're not being chased by a lion. Remind yourself, are you in danger? Yes? THEN THIS IS GOOD, THIS WILL HELP YOU IN THIS SITUATION, GTFO. Are you not in danger? Then become aware of this. Think to yourself, I'm not in danger, I don't need to feel this way. Reminding yourself that you are safe will help you a lot.
This won't fix it right away, but self reflection is an important tool, and the more you use it the more it becomes effective.

After a stressful situation is over, do some more reflection. Did you do your best? No? Well learn from your mistakes, and research how to do better. Next time a similar situation comes up you will be more prepared and you might even gain confidence with this. So you did do your best? Then good job, some things are out of your control and if you handled it the best you could then there is no reason to beat yourself up. I will give you an example:
I work in the emergency department and people go into cardiac arrest. That means their heart is not beating and they most likely will die. It doesn't haunt me when people that I work on die, because I know all of the procedures and follow them exactly as I should as it is happening. As long as I did everything right, it is out of my control and nature will take it's course if it is this person's time. When I was new and fumbled a lot in these high stress situations, I took it upon myself to learn how to be better and by watching people who are working under the same stressful condition.

Moving on, self care is important. Find things that motivate you, and use that to your advantage.
I used to have a lot of anxiety going to the grocery store by myself, but goddamn do I love shitty grocery store sushi.
I felt anxious, but hey, if I do this one thing, I can get to the goods and treat my self.
I would reflect afterwords and think, hey? Is this so bad? People are here doing the same thing as me, minding their own business. Everything is fine after all.

Another example, you feel like you can't get out of bed. You wake up anxious, and you don't want to start your day because you're in your safe place and it's comfortable and warm. But think about something that makes you want to leave your bed, like for example maybe today, you should make your favorite breakfast. You don't normally make your favorite breakfast, because it's a little more complicated than your usual cereal and milk, but you know what, today is the day you're going to make that complicated favorite breakfast because you just woke up and you feel like your day already sucks. TREAT. YO. DAMN. SELF. PUT. IN. THE. WORK. Your day will go from being shitty to GREAT. Because goddamn, that breakfast was bomb. Godamn, I'm out of bed already. Maybe I should start doing all the things I need to get done. The hardest part is over, and here we are now.
Because if you decided to stay in your safe place, and let your errands suffer, you will feel even more anxious. And you don't want that.

Find what makes you anxious, and show it whose boss. That boss is you, so put it in it's damn place.
GL friend, and I hope you feel better soon.

[Mindfang]

zoloft helps me for the most part. which is like... not for everyone i know but as we all know here im very OCD and ive been living with anxiety and agoraphobia and nothing has helped me as much as being on medication. like. things helped? and medication doesnt do everything? but it helps as a side thing you know?

me and my gf do guided meditation just to give ourselves a moment. that app Headspace is pretty good. just taking a second to breathe and let everything out and think about the positives while letting go of the negatives helps.

im also no stranger to suggesting to writing things down. when do you feel anxious? do you know why? make a note of it and why it happened. if you dont know, dont worry about it, just write down when the anxiety happened. next time you feel it pop up in that situation (if there is a next time), try to focus on what you were thinking/doing before you felt the anxiety become too much. when you start noticing patterns, start looking for ways to break them. most of the time its something very simple that can help. i know ocd doesnt affect everyone, but one story of ocd that always stuck with me was a woman who was obsessed with her hairdryer catching fire while she was out. she would always be late to work because she would unplug the hairdryer, leave the house, then drive back home to check for certain she had unplugged the hairdryer. after a while, she was driving back and forth between home and work up to eight times before she was convinced. eventually someone suggested she just... take the hairdryer with her in the car. that way shes certain its unplugged, because its right there next to her. she doesnt need to drive home to check, she can just look to the passengers seat and have immediate proof that she unplugged it.

that was a simple solution to a problem that she felt was completely overwhelming. all it took was pinpointing her source of anxiety and receiving a pointer from someone else with a completely objective opinion on the situation. sometimes thats all it takes to cut out the anxiety of a situation. a lot of people (including myself) get easily frustrated with people who dont have an idea of what anxiety is like outside of worrying slightly, but sometimes those people give the best insights to problems that anxiety turns into absolute mountains instead of the barely formed molehills they are.

idk if im making sense?
basically. it sounds simple. but talk to people when possible. tell people "im really anxious about x because y", and they may be able to give input that you yourself would never think of because the anxiety wouldnt let you.
when you cant talk, just meditate. i thought it was bullshit for the longest time, but it really does help LMAO.
and if/when you can, try medication. its tough to get adjusted to, and finding the right one might take a while, but medication absolutely saved my life.


all this has 100% been said already probably but we all know i refuse to read anything and love the sight of my own posts.

[Mama Bear]

There's been a lot of good advice given so far, so I'm just going to add a couple of things I don't think I saw.

People talking about the benefit of a big cry, that's something that's been identified since Ancient Greece. Aristotle talked about release through drama, getting out those pent up emotions to cleanse ourselves. That's where we get the word "cathartic" from; the Greek katharos (meaning pure) also happens to be the etymology of my full name, Katherine.

Mindfulness is a cognitive behavioural therapy technique that can help in those anxious situations. I really liked @(you need an account to see links)'s chased by a lion one too though! It's about grounding yourself in what is real. What can you see? What can you smell? What can you touch? What can you hear? Those things are real, and by focusing on those it can help bring you down from the heightened emotions or panic.

The last thing I'll mention is goal setting. When you said that you enjoy having full control of your Neopets account, I totally related. Likewise, I find having realistic goals to work towards (both in games and in life) really helpful in keeping me on track emotionally, because I know what I'm doing and why I'm doing it. Short, mid and long term goals help make sure we're not just shooting for something overly ambitious. The root of my anxiety comes from my desire to be in control (consequence of a shitty childhood), so it is really frustrating when I know I've done everything I could, everything right, but things don't work out because of the incompetence or stupid choices of others. The goals help with that, because they remind me that I'm still taking actions that are purposeful in the grander scheme of things, as they are developing towards the goals.

I'm glad to see that in the span of this thread you've gone from unsure about professional help to booking in a referral. Like you, I was worried that the shrink would feel like I was wasting his time. And, I won't lie, a lot of the stuff he said just felt really douchey and stupid to me. I was honest with him about that. When he'd suggest something too douchey, I'd laugh and say that I appreciate his ideas, but that one wasn't for me. Just being able to vent and be heard by a someone new, and being guided to focus on my goals, did help though. I only had about 4 or 5 sessions and I was good to go.

[Misha]

My anxiety cripples me on a daily basis. I've lost jobs, relationships, made decisions that landed me in terrible situations, etc.

If I could travel 6 years in to the past, I never would have started my doctor prescribed benzodiazepines. I'm now dealing with terrible rebound anxiety, everything is foggy all of the time, I've tried every SSRI and SSNI there is. Nothing helps. My advice would be to talk to your doctor about CBD oil. I used it for a while and it actually helped my anxiety. More than anything else ever has and there was no side effects. I can't take it now because I'm on probation and it can possibly show up in a urinalysis.

Good luck.