Why would they hire you?
What else can you add?
What is your best hability?
Laboral Experience?
Recomendations?
I personally would be sure to add WHY they should hire you, although you basically spelled it out id write how willingly you are to do what is needed.
-shrugs- theres my 2sense
Why would they hire you?
What else can you add?
What is your best hability?
Laboral Experience?
Recomendations?
It looks pretty well.
Id say that you can add an "extra" part when you say why you are their best option & why they should hire you.
I dont think the language you use is a problem because you show that you know what you are talking about.
Ok so it looks good on the whole but a few tips:
1) Put experience in reverse order, with your most recent at the top. That is the most relevant so they should see that first(likewise with education when you have other stuff to add there in the future)
2) Can't see what details you've covered but basically make sure you include: Name, Address, Phone Number, Email
3) It's good to have stuff not directly related to the job on there. For example, do you do any voluntary work? Play in a sports team? Basically anything to give the employer something to look at that makes you stand out, makes you seem more human and also gives you something to talk about at interview.
4) This is just a personal thing really but I'd probably change point 3 of your Summary, it reads a little cheesy and doesn't sound genuine, which is the most important thing with a CV/resume.
5)As someone said, don't put the position you're applying for, they'll know since you'll be sending it with a covering letter.
6) References- Include the contact details of at least 1, preferably 2 people who they could get in touch with. If you're young, one is fine to be an academic reference(form tutor or the teacher who knows you best) but at least one should be someone you know in a more work/voluntary based manner if possible
The main plus points:
-Concise
-Explains what you did at each role/job
-Bullet points make it easy to pick up and read
Some of the stuff I suggested won't be a massive deal if it's just for class but it's 1)good to get into the habit and 2)useful to have a CV you can just update rather than having to write one from scratch.
Hope that helps
Edit:
I think a CV like this is going to be for applying for jobs in the industry where the language is going to be fairly well understood. If someone's hiring for a computer position and doesn't have someone who knows computers reading the CVs then I'm not sure you would want to be working for them...
That sounds like a good attitude to bring to an interview.
Joking aside, I think some kind of compromise is needed: the general project should probably be described in layman's terms, but additional detail may be given underneath in a more technical language. When you apply for a job, there are multiple who you need to please, and usually not all of them are specialists.
Fatality.
I beg to differ. If someone were applying for a Medical position, I'd expect them to tell me they had a DPhil and had experience in Tracheotomies, not that they had a Medical qualification and knew how to cut people's necks open. It's a specialist field, you should use specialist language or you look either like you don't know what you're talking about or you don't rate the reader's intelligence/knowledge
If you use silly language, you're going to have a silly resume. I think that's the only point which you make with your example, there.
However, there is no harm done by using a summary/detail method of explanation. Not only are you able to access a larger percentage of people who will be reading your resume, but you may also use the opportunity to catch the attention of any reader, specialist or otherwise, through the emboldening of important points.
Fatality.
The phrase "I used to" is beautiful in that regards
In terms of sports, it's even easier to do: "I played a lot of sport in high school and whilst time has been more limited since then, I still love to play soccer when I get the chance." Otherwise, do you have any other interest or hobbies outside of computers?
Hmm. I can't think how to reword it right now, I'll have to get back to you. This is normally my forte too :s
Ah, well if you've been taught to do it that way then I guess leave it. But for most jobs you'll send a CV with a covering letter and it will be in the covering letter that you state for what position you are applying.
Except that on a CV, space is at a premium. If something on there isn't: Showing you're clever; Showing you're good for the job; Showing you're human; Showing you're interesting: then it shouldn't really be there. Obviously this debate is mostly moot since you'll tailor your CV to each job anyway, but your basic CV should be written in the specialist language for the field to which you are applying. Restating a job description in layman's terms doesn't embolden a point, it just restates the description.