How will you raise your offspring unit?

[Leet]

then he married a girl who grew up with a spoon in her mouth who will not tolerate any sort of real punishment besides "youre losing your toy for a few minutes or until you whine enough".

...Oh God D:

My girlfriend grew up extremely spoiled. Well. ~__~. The things I've listed don't apply to discipline! ;D

That is just how I see it, my mom never went to college and she was so proud of me going because I now have opportunities that she never had so I will feel the same for my child and expect them to carry on the high education to guarantee their success in the future.

Yesyesyes, I absolutely second this. Education opens doors.

[Scarydark]

With Fascism and Tyranny

[Kristin]

This is an interesting topic for me because my daughter just turned 1 and we are having to start making decisions about how she is allowed to act. I want her to grow up to be respectful, openminded and confident. My parents were never supportive of my dreams and goals, so I want to support her in whatever she chooses to do. Confidence is another big thing for me because I've always had low self esteem that has caused me to miss opportunities. I want her to know what she wants and go after it.

[Meagan]

My daughter is 5 months old and I'm a single parent, I really can't say how I'll be with her in the future since every kid has a different personality. She might be a little brat and I have to discipline often, she might be eager to learn, I really can't say till her personality develops. I will just be here for her, guide her, and pray that she has some ambition in life. You aren't handed a handbook in parenting and what might work for one kid won't work on another. You love them unconditionally, hope for the best. I will try my hardest to give her all that she needs as a single mom and the love she should have gotten from her sperm donor.

[Sci_Girl]

This is an interesting topic for me because my daughter just turned 1 and we are having to start making decisions about how she is allowed to act. I want her to grow up to be respectful, openminded and confident.

My mom ran a dayhome for about 15 years so I was exposed to all sorts of children and their parents. The parents who did not discipline had the bad children. Discipline does not mean yelling at the child or locking them away in their room for a "time out" for 2 hours. It means the stern No. If the child learns no and which touching of objects with get the "no no no don't do that" then they learn "oh maybe I shouldn't open that drawer because all the crayons will fall out on me". The other thing is to let them get hurt lol, honestly that is the biggest learning tool for a child. I am not saying let them play with scissors but if they keep opening up the toy box after you said no and it closes on their finger you comfort them and say "I told you no because you would be hurt and see you got hurt so do not open the toy box like that anymore"...they understand that more once they hit about 1 year old. It is all about patience. All children will lash out and be little brats from time to time but the key is in them learning that no means no.

[Kristin]

My mom ran a dayhome for about 15 years so I was exposed to all sorts of children and their parents. The parents who did not discipline had the bad children. Discipline does not mean yelling at the child or locking them away in their room for a "time out" for 2 hours. It means the stern No. If the child learns no and which touching of objects with get the "no no no don't do that" then they learn "oh maybe I shouldn't open that drawer because all the crayons will fall out on me". The other thing is to let them get hurt lol, honestly that is the biggest learning tool for a child. I am not saying let them play with scissors but if they keep opening up the toy box after you said no and it closes on their finger you comfort them and say "I told you no because you would be hurt and see you got hurt so do not open the toy box like that anymore"...they understand that more once they hit about 1 year old. It is all about patience. All children will lash out and be little brats from time to time but the key is in them learning that no means no.

I agree! I always run into people who are so surprised that I actually tell my daughter "no". I think it's important to set the ground rules when they're young, too, because it helps when they're older.

[Cara]

I know for a fact I will let them make their own decisions, unless it's life threatening. There is nothing more annoying then a parent who tries to control and live their child's life. I would try my best to make sure they know I am always there for them to talk to and they can tell me anything without feeling uncomfortable or think that i'm judging them silently. Definetly wouldn't spoil them. I would get them things they NEED, like clothes, food, etc. but if they want something that wouldnt be in my budget range, like random toys, electronics, etc. they could save up for it themselves with either their allowance money or if they have a small job. That way, they hopefully learn how to manage their money and don't grow up thinking they can get whatever they please.

BUT, although I wish I could do all those things up there.
I would probably be screaming my head off and being a spaz.
So yeah. WOO!

[MasterMind0wnz]

I will do my best to make sure that my spawn learns from example. Everyone wants a smart kid.. Obviously. I just want mine to be able to distinguish right from wrong and to be able to learn from what he/she has seen or been taught and to have compassion for others. Although compassionate, tolerance isn't always necessary.

[Sci_Girl]

I agree! I always run into people who are so surprised that I actually tell my daughter "no". I think it's important to set the ground rules when they're young, too, because it helps when they're older.

From my experience of all the children over the years the worst are the parents that pamper and give into their child's every whim. Pick them up every 2 seconds or pick them up at any slight sniffle from the kid they will be clingy and needy and could have separation anxiety. And when they are even older those children believe anything they want goes, if they do not want to share they will hit someone, if they do not want to go to soccer practice they will scream at the parent, if they do not think the teacher should be the one in charge in school they will lash out. Those parents will give their kid whatever they want from the start, ice cream, new toys, a new game any time they throw a fit. No that is not what you do, you can bargain with a kid saying "if you come shopping with mommy I will buy you an ice cream after but only if you are good"...but you do not buy that ice cream if they start whining or stomping their feet. If they do that you pick them up, put them in the car and drive home with no ice cream and they can sit on the couch until they stop crying, not in their room full of toys (they will learn nothing from having a room full of toys around them). We dealt with several kids that also thought they were little miss perfect because "mommy buys me everything and I do not eat vegetables"...well too bad when you are at the babysitters you are having your veggies and no treat if you do not finish. Even the most stubborn of those kids eventually learn that at the babysitters you are eating your veggies if you want that treat even if at home you are allowed to whine about wanting a cookie instead of carrots. It is about balancing stern rules with an understanding that children will still be little brats from time to time and no matter how much they may listen they will have those days when they want their way and cry all day lol.

[Jose]

ive had friends who talked about this

fast forward to having kids

it doesnt always work out the way you plan :/

fuckin amen to that...
dont work out the way you plan, or even think n shit..
like i didnt plan to have a kid n shit.
whatever i just went with it.
thought the best, tried the best n shit of my ability. i get fucked over.
there`s so much to say, that ppl think n stuff.
reality you cant even explain it right.