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Yes, this 1000000%.
But clothing isn't people so that's not really a fair comparison..
It's fine to have preferences. I don't think anyone is negating that. It's when someone preference insists on telling another person they aren't worthy, like this one does, that it becomes yucky. That's not "excluding a group in peace." It's excluding a group and being proud and loud about it. Especially in this case, Super Straight it reminding trans men and women that society doesn't actually see them as men or women. It'd be like me saying "I love sleeping with men! Except you uglies with big noses, you all can fuck off!" A decent person would just keep it to themselves. This feels like a rambling train of thought, just had to get it out there.
A (03-16-2021),ny b od y Dot (03-28-2021),dustyc (03-17-2021),glittery (04-16-2021),Goddammit (03-24-2021),♥ PrettySarcastic ♥ (03-16-2021),TsUNaMy WaVe (03-17-2021),wha (10-03-2023),Winona (03-31-2021),Zapdos (03-18-2021)
So, if this is not the way, how does one say they're not attracted to trans people in a good way? I'm on a dating app that's kinda like grindr/tinder(haven't used it in a while though) where I'm obliged to see trans men when I state I want to see men (there are two buttons: men & trans men, if you click on the men button, the trans men button is automatically checked too. This doesn't happen with the men button when I click the trans men button). How fair is this when I always swipe those away because I'm just not attracted to them? "Forcing" trans people onto people who aren't interested isn't going to get them any matches so I don't get why the app does this.
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I think if 4chan hadn't included naziism into it, it could have actually been it's own valid sexuality. There's nothing wrong with preferences, that's why we even have sexualities in the first place. There is nothing transphobic about not wanting to date trans people unless it's because you hate them.
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ribossoma (03-20-2021)
I think it sounds like it was a term that was put into place with the intent of causing issues and stirring up controversy. Personally I don’t care how somebody identifies, I have loved ones from all sides of the coin. Everyone deserves to be respected for who they are and it’s as simple as that. Being super straight or super gay - well that’s just super but does it make one better than the other; being straight vs super straight or gay vs super gay? I don’t mind however people want to identify, it only rubs me the wrong way when somebody feels the need to be all up in my face about it or tries to make my views feel less important than theirs because it’s not as big of an issue for me.
At the end of the day, be who you want, love who ya want, and do no harm. Everybody needs to worry more about themselves and less about putting down others *♂️
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I don't see how you are not making anyone's life miserable by having your own sexual identity?
It seems like most people have a problem with the origin of the term but the meaning itself isn't too harmful? Am I reading the room correctly? Would (you need an account to see links) be less harmful than "super straight"? (I had to google what TERF means lol)
Trying to follow the logic... is not the definition of homosexuality "being attracted to your own sex"? Which would be excluding a group? So a Gay Pride parade would be the proud and loud exclusion of Straight people?
I get that. "Super" is not the right preposition to use, it makes me think of "super Aryan". But what would be a good term? Bio(logically) gay? Just brainstorming, I don't mean anything by it. I want to do it the good way.
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@(you need an account to see links), well you can be gay and be attracted to trans gays as well? That's also homosexuality.
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A (03-16-2021)ny b od y
I’m by no means qualified to speak on these topics but I just had a thought. It’s on the difference between equality and equity. We can’t judge transexuality by the same standards as heterosexuality and now homosexuality, because those are already established in society (don’t get me wrong, homosexuality still has its struggles).
Transexuality is like the younger sibling trying to find their place in the world, so something that might not be harmful to the hetero/homo sexual community can still be harmful to the transexual community in light of this. People are in the thick of working to establish the trans community as valid, so let’s give them some room while they do that and kindly express our preferences rather than perpetuate terms created by these unsavoury groups.
(Edit to add, for context personally I would not exclude trans people from my dating pool)
Last edited by Anybody; 03-16-2021 at 11:25 AM.
glittery (04-16-2021),Goddammit (04-14-2021),LibraryFaerie (03-16-2021),Nattiee (03-16-2021)
To my knowledge, the correct term is 'Cishet' or 'Cissex', people that identify as their biological sex that are sexually attracted to their cis opposite. Actually searched this a while ago when i tried to explain to my partner why i was demi, he is cishet to the point he find it ridiculous the term 'Super Straight'
As others have said, the expresion 'Super Straight' was intendent to hurt the trans comunity by implying they're not what they feel themselves to be, so it's better, imo, to avoid the term at all and prefer Cishet/Cissex that, on the contrary, can only be seem as "preference to born/cis opposite sex", and not "preference to opposite sex excluding trans". On the same hand we can use Cisgay/Cisles that may consider gay/lesbian for cis; i love 'GAY AF' tho ahahhah
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I think to begin with it hasn't been represented the right way by some but most movements in the early phases are similar to begin with. Always extreme types sadly pushing it the wrong way. Same could be said for those crazy feminist types that absolutely hate men when the movement is really about empowering woman. It's really about empowerment that is why all these different sexual preferences exist to empower people for the people.
Gay people see themselves as gay not wanting to be with opposite sex. Super Straights don't want to be with trans. they are literally the same thing excluding a group of people. When it comes down to it people have always exclude groups of people across history so it's nothing new that something like this has popped up.
I myself have been with a trans person and it frankly wasn't for me so evidently I've excluded trans from my sexual preference since and don't plan to change that. I'd imagine you have your own preference and exclude a group of people or many groups.
The equity vs equality argument is good. I pulled a few quotes from an article that better articulate it from that viewpoint
“Straight Pride” movement trivializes the trials and tribulations that the LGBTQ community is up against. Straight people are quite literally never the target of violence for wanting to love who they love or for trying to live a truer version of their lives... Pride Month is more than just rainbow floats and Drag Queens lip-syncing for their lives. It’s an opportunity to do what those at Stonewall couldn’t do: be themselves without shame or fear of retaliation.
Straight Pride is an opportunity for what? Celebrate the fact that straight people never have to worry about prejudice being brought against them for being straight?
And @(you need an account to see links) to your point - I don't want to discredit your feelings, but I don't think it's necessarily forcing anyone on you? Even without trans men in the mix, I imagine you'd still be swiping no on people for reasons other than their body parts. I think if an app wants to open itself up to letting people choose "no brown eyes, no one under 5'8, no one over 130lbs, etc." and then they also threw in "no trans men" as an option, it'd be less yucky?
And as @DaPlusheeBoree pointed out, terms like "cishet" have never felt as yucky as the term "super straight" though they both have similar meanings.. there's definitely a lot to be said on the intent behind a term.
At the end of the day I am a cis white woman speaking from a place of privilege, so don't take my word as gospel (i also have mega covid brain and have a hard time making complete thoughts). It's just things I've learned in conversation with people from marginalized communities.