How do you feel about people getting married young?

[haiqtpi]

I could not care less what other people do with their lives. This said, I mean as a gay man, I tend to have friends who "date" a lot of guys and have a lot of "relationships (dating in the gay world is reallllly interesting)." For this reason, I have, in my own mind, formed kind of a "keys to a successful longterm relationship/marriage" list, especially considering that I have been with my husband for 11 years, and this seems to be a rare longevity among my NYC peers. I do think that one should have an idea of what else is out there, which tends to suggest that there is a degree of maturity required in a successful relationship (again, IMO). This is now to say that someone 18-21 cannot possibly accomplish this, but realistically, the laws of probability suggest that this is more unlikely. In addition to having some idea of what else is out there, a solid sense of self really helps, as does "pre-cohabilitation"--I have always thought that people who do not cohabitate before marriage are at a severe disadvantage because we all have pet-peeves and things of the like, and these can be deal breakers. If we do not know whether or not our potential living partner possesses these dealbreakers, it can lead to unintentional resentment/issues early on. Again, all of this is anecdotal and strictly opinion, but that is my $.02.

[Tribulation81]

If its what they want, then why not? They arent marrying the people.

[dyori]

It's none of my business but it does baffle me seeing someone around my age (or younger) married (and even having a few kids) because I can't ever imagine myself in their position. :p I'm in my early-mid 20s and I feel like that's still too young of an age in this time and age to be tied down by spousal/familial commitment and obligations.

[eCosS]

I think bullshit. I care for freedom.

[70spurple]

IMPORTANT: I totally DO NOT MEAN child marriages. Everyone here is 18 at this point. I'm talking about like 18-21.

How do you guys feel about young marriages, like literally out of high school or in college? I know some people don't feel that it'll last but others think high school sweethearts will stay together forever. Some young couples do it for the government benefits of being a poor college couple, and some are just impulsive and don't know what they want. I want to know everyone else's opinion and maybe some stories and share a story I'm currently WTFing at right now.

Even though I completely detached myself from my high school my senior year, I still used Facebook to keep up to date on people I know and general high school drama. Graduation was officially May 23rd, and now we are officially high schol graduates. Since then, two couples have gotten engaged, and one got married (tiny wedding before he ships off in the navy or something).
I'm just like ????????
I've known these people since elementary school pretty much, and one of them basically my whole life. Navy couple girl is totally impulsive, and goes after everything that isn't hers. She spent much of her high school career scooping up ex boyfriends of her friends and then wondering why she lost a friend - her husband is one of those conquests. I'm pretty sure that marriage is doomed for divorce - but who knows, they're both terrible people, they might be perfect.
The other couple I kinda understand, as he's from a Muslim family (though they aren't super religious and controlling) and she has a lot of family issues. They're both great people, and were my best friends at points, but for reasons we just kinda stopped talking. I think they'll actually stay together, they're fantastic for each other and I support them wholeheartedly.

It just feels surreal to me that these people are getting married and we literally just graduated high school. They haven't even been together that long, and it kinda makes me feel weird, too. I've been with my boyfriend for 3+ yrs, and we live together now, but aren't married, and these people that have been together less than a year are marrying off and being adults.
{I know I've been in college the past year but please don't make me adult yet I'm not ready D:}

Where do they get the money to elope like that??

[Bexxie]

Where do they get the money to elope like that??

I eloped in Vegas for like $100. It's not that expensive.

[Synth Salazzle]

If they're ready then why not? I don't see a problem with it as long as the relationship is a healthy one. People meet the right person at different ages, who am I to judge?

[70spurple]

I eloped in Vegas for like $100. It's not that expensive.

Pics or it didn't happen lol

[Bexxie]

Pics or it didn't happen lol

This was back in 2009 so it may be a little more expensive now but I'm not lying. We were a broke AF couple when we got married so we went with the cheapest route possible.

[kadoatie]

I don't really care about what people do, but I do get nervous if they say something related to religion to justify a marriage or something lol.
One of my friends married last year when she was 20 because someone from her church said that they were meant to each other and all that bullshit. Now they are still married but they get into discussions everyday and she says she's tired of that but god wouldn't forgive her if they break up @(you need an account to see links)______@