It depends if they have a stable relationship, I'm all in for people to love the way they want if no one is hurt. But marriage is a once in a lifetime kind of thing, so they need to be sure that they want to spend the rest of their lives with each other.
I mean, I don't really judge. Not my life, so it doesn't matter to me. BUT as far as my thoughts on it... I personally feel like 18/19 is too young. To me, I think 21+ is a good age, because 1. You can drink at your own wedding and 2. You are a fully formed adult now who had had a few years to decide as an adult if the person you are marrying is who you want to marry.
High school sweethearts don't always end up happily ever after, so it's better to wait a few years after high school and see how you react to the adult world as adults to make sure the person you're with is right for you.
tbh, 18 doesn't mean as much as it did 30+ years ago. My parents and grandparents lived in a time where 18 meant you were already working a summer job and now it's time to move out. Nowadays people are living with their parents a lot longer (Nothing wrong with that ofc. I live with mine because I'm not paid enough to live on my own). They're just not at that level at that age that the previous generations were.
Hi, I'll leave my story here:
I was married at age 17 and it lasted 5 years ... but I can say that there was no maturity in the marriage, and both wanted to live the things that had not yet lived, because they were in a marriage ... this was my experience in getting married early. From this, I think that getting married early is not correct, by skipping several stages of life, that sooner or later you will want to live them
only going off my own experience, but i think it's good to date more than one person (not just as a teenager). i was all set to marry a manipulative boyfriend of 5 years because i figured it was the next step and why waste a 5 year relationship?
so glad i got out and still can't believe i was all set to dedicate myself to that creep
I think it's less about age and more about 1) time together and 2) maturity. I'm "old" by this forum's demographic, in my 30s, so I've seen my share of peer divorces. If people got married after less than a year or two of being together they usually didn't get to know the person enough so it's a roll of the dice if they'll make it through the long haul. You have to see how you'll do when one of you faces a real hardship: a death in the close family, a serious disease diagnosis, dropping out of college or enrolling in grad school, moving hundreds of miles away for a job, a bankruptcy, legal troubles, even just a major a falling out with a good friend. You have to experience SHIT to see if you're compatible during both the good and the bad. This person isn't just your best friend they are your PARTNER, through everything. As for maturity, every 18-21 year old will call themselves mature. It's rare that they are IMO. So many technically-adults still have their parents call in their own dental appointments for crying out loud, let alone competently managing their own finances, school/work, keeping their home from being a pig-sty, and don't even get me started on simply trusting their partner. If you're constantly digging through old text messages on their phone while they're in the shower you ain't mature (projecting on an old friend, here. lol)
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I'm gonna echo k80's point and say it's less about objective age and more about personal maturity and knowing each other. If even one of the partners are not mature enough nor are in the same page as the other, things will quickly crumble. I can cite the very case of my parents, which quickly (and I mean so quickly it was even before the wedding date) began crumbling, and spiraled down into a terribly toxic relationship, and has been like that ever since. 20+ years of it. Affecting even the children in. Just think about it.
When I see two adults that young getting married, I find it nice to know that they like each other that much, and I find it really nice to know that other people are making idiotic decisions too.
I will start off by saying, of course, everyone is different. However, I thought my high school sweet heart was the love of my life. We were together for 5 years, and at that time in my life (at that age) it was an eternity. We had a child together and moved in together. I mean, of course we were going to get married. He had some serious drug problems though and put me through hell, but I stuck by him. When he decided to get help and attend AA meetings, of course, I was thrilled. Then he met someone else in AA. More power to him. Now the two of them were off and running. He was worse than ever. His was getting arrested for DUI as was she. Glad I wasn't the one dealing with him anymore. So I dated quite a bit, and eventually found my current husband. I met him at 24, was married at age 28, we had a child together, and 23 years later, we are still together. So personally, I feel, if it works out that's great. You don't need to push things by getting married so young. If you are truly in love, you will be together. It is much harder to end a marriage than a relationship.
I got married at 23 and we will be divorcing soon. We got together when I was 16 and I just kept going with it because of the sunken cost fallacy. I've since found someone that I truly love but yeah not before a failed marriage and a child. So, I think people should put a lot of thought into marrying young! Every situation is different though.
