Why being a good guy doesnt attract girls for me?

[Zhukov]

or you can buy her love

This is true! Get conflict-free chocolates or whatever, women love that shit.

[Zyia]

Well, a lot may be due to your age, which I have no idea how old you are, so the basis for the girls you may be going after will be difficult. However with that said, I dislike the idea of a 'friend-zone' there is no friend-zone, girls have not put you in the friend-zone that implies that the only reason why you're around them is for the possibility to sleep with them which is very degrading. It also puts the onus on the girl.. "If only she'd realize that everything she wants is me!".. Course that makes her feelings towards you invalid and yours are not, which of course, you want her to touch your fun parts but because you've been 'friend-zoned' she's a bitch that doesn't want you. Which is just disrespectful all around.

I see so many people on my facebook post "I dislike being single, but I am after some god of a person and my gosh.. I won't settle for anything less, why doesn't someone want me". So you have to determine what are you after? Sex? Sex is easy to get, anyone can get laid, it just depends on your standards. A relationship however is different, and in that respect going after women that are looking for the same thing you are is the key.

Additionally, self-respect and confidence is amazing. It's difficult to love someone if you don't first love yourself, I realise that sounds like a copout, but it's true. How can you expect someone to love you, if you don't first love yourself? How are you going to connect to someone else, if you're not connected to who you really are. (Here is a reddit that helps to explain that point as I understand it really does sound cliche - (you need an account to see links) ) Don't focus so much on finding love, instead focus on yourself, enjoying yourself, love tends to find us when we least expect it.

A personal story, it's very difficult to be with someone who puts their entire emotional well-being on you. I was with a guy for a very long time, who if I said something negative around him would mope all day and it was very hard to know that if I left, he may harm himself, in the end it was dangerous for me to remain with him and I had to make that choice. Don't be that person.

With all of that said, I personally, dislike men who are disrespectful but I love strong, confident men (Not arrogant though, which is very annoying for me). I love men that are interesting, and I tend to seek out the quiet ones because I find they have the most to say.

Course, with all of this, I am 32, so I am probably out of the demographic for advice.

[Miri]

not sure if roll bread...
straight up, OP, you sound beta. Anyone can be nice. There are more things to offer than being nice.
From my perspective the "hardcore guys that curse and shit" are the confident, lively ones... every woman would know better than to date something beta. Women IMO are naturally wired to find men that are confident etc because biology wants them to have strong kids and shit. Do not blame your failure in getting a girl on the hardcore guys. Those niggas aint even hardcore probably, they're normal people like you and I, you're just demonizing them for having what you can't get. the issue then lies in yourself... something about you is turning girls off. Work on yourself first.

[icebox]

Advice for OP: If you wear a fedora, cut that shit into tiny pieces and throw it away and never even so much as think about wearing one ever again. It'd be a good starting point.

To add to Miri's reply, you should also never blame your 'failure' on the women around you either. I wouldn't call it failure; the right kind of gal probably just hasn't rolled around yet.

Anyway, I tend to get vicious about this sort of complaint simply because I hear it commonly from men who believe that women 'owe' them something (usually affection, sexual or otherwise) because they're 'nice' and 'not like all those other men'. If this is you, then please take heed of this friendly reminder from God-zilla:



It usually all depends on your motives for being nice. If you're being nice to get laid, you're a dick, stop complaining. On the other hand, if it's out of a genuine heart for people and a lack of female attention just happens to be a kinda side effect you've noticed, then that sucks and I wish you the best.

[|2eap]

Just do you bro.
Trust me, hooking up with all these fine ass bitchachos aint really like what its made out to be lol
Half the time the sex isnt good, threesomes arent that much fun unless they are freaky. then you question what kind of shit they have done before you lmao

Use to be all about it, now i'm like meh w/e. I guess i done sexed myself out. I like saving it for someone special and someone I actually enjoy having sex with now than to try and put another notch in my belt.

I guess I grew up some, fuck if I know. I went from going out to get fucked up and get laid to going out to go have fun with whoever the fuck is there and make friends.

That being said, it all started back in the day where my success when i persued these things was being the life of the party. not at parties so to speak but anywhere everywhere, be enjoyable to be around. Also be level headed, know the right things to say and dont be scared to say it. Show that you are a leader, an alpha male and that you know what you are doing. Never be scared. I guess it falls back to loving yourself because when you love yourself you truly love you life and the people around you. It rubbs off on other people, if your a downer everyones gonna picture you with "bitch dont kill my vibe"

Anyways I dont condone just going around and sleeping around but i understand sometimes you need the confidence booster or smth. So, get yourself out there big dawg. Stand your ground and just be yourself, dress nice. Try not to come off as creepy, like its important to you. Just be like casual and if it happens it happens. Dont go all weird on me bro.

Good luck.

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---------- Post added at 10:17 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:16 PM ----------

OH! and when you go out and prove yourself as alpha male, most the time they come to you ;D

[Neal Caffrey]

before you start: sorry for the errors - grammar, spelling and everything else.

if you have too much friends (girls!!) they will treat you like her's gay friend. even if you aren't. thats a starting point.

second: if you are too nice, they will not consider being with you because "they need someone to put in the FZ", and being with you may "ruin the magic friendship you both have"

the secret? NEVER expect nothing. do what you do just because you want to. theres isn't a "trick". you just have to be patient and wait.

whats the point of being with a "bad guy"? they - may - be a good guy. and what about you? girls are sure you are a good guy. thats why you are in the "end of the row".

feel free to reply if you disagree

ps.: thats why I date guys (and girls when they want to)

[Fleur]

@(you need an account to see links)

As a female, I disagree.

Just because a guy has lots of female friends, doesn't make him gay. Same as if a girl hangs out with a lot of guys, she isn't a lesbian... I don't think you can just assume that someone is homosexual based on that alone...

I don't get this whole "bad guy vs good guy" thing. Everyone has different preferences on who they want to date, you can't just group a bunch of individuals together and base assumptions out of them because of their gender or whatever. Some girls like "good guys", some girls like "bad guys". And what makes a person "bad" or "good" anyway? Idgi.

Individuals can't speak for whole groups of people. Everyone is different. You'll eventually find someone that actually likes you for who you are, cuz personal preference and whatever, there's no set of codes you have to abide by *cough*lol@theredpill*cough* to "get" with girls.

IDK ANYMORE I'M OUTTA HERE.

[Neal Caffrey]

@(you need an account to see links)

As a female, I disagree.

Just because a guy has lots of female friends, doesn't make him gay. Same as if a girl hangs out with a lot of guys, she isn't a lesbian... I don't think you can just assume that someone is homosexual based on that alone...

I don't get this whole "bad guy vs good guy" thing. Everyone has different preferences on who they want to date, you can't just group a bunch of individuals together and base assumptions out of them because of their gender or whatever. Some girls like "good guys", some girls like "bad guys". And what makes a person "bad" or "good" anyway? Idgi.

Individuals can't speak for whole groups of people. Everyone is different. You'll eventually find someone that actually likes you for who you are, cuz personal preference and whatever, there's no set of codes you have to abide by *cough*lol@theredpill*cough* to "get" with girls.

IDK ANYMORE I'M OUTTA HERE.

merging what I've said and what you said, the answer for this question is simple and direct:

Because some girls look for bad guys (in YOUR concept, not necessarily on her's) and the ones looking for good guys just don't want you bc lol isn't bc u r a good guy that she will HAVE to date you. I mean, you are a @(you need an account to see links). they don't like nerds. they like REAL DUDES. (brb laughing)
I mean: go out. hang out with friends. you will find a girl. but don't expect - the better comes when you aren't expecting

@Edit; look what I've found in my facebook's timeline


translating:
"- God, send me a man that understand my needs and make me feel special
- I've done this some years ago but you insits calling him "friend""

[osiyo]

(you need an account to see links)

[apayton]

Just find someone who shares the same values as you, and always be honest