Originally Posted by
Clark
I hate when people say don't change yourself, blah blah. People have to change, have to adapt. Maturity involved adapting for the person you are with. It's part of acceptance and part of trust. Don't necessarily change who you are as a person, your fundamental being. But little things? If we never changed, we would make the same mistakes again and again for our entire lives.
What do guys want? Probably someone that genuinely cares about them. Girls make stuff into such a game, and make love so complex. Love isn't about leverage, about control, or about playing some arcane manipulative game. Once you start to trust someone, let your guard down a bit if you think they're worthy of it. Tbh, the only times I ever get into fights with my gf is when she gets overly protective or closed in about things. Like when, for instance, she gets mad if I don't make the first move whenever we have sex and consequently don't have sex but also rebuffs me when I make the first move too often. Those stupid mind games make you see shadows where there aren't any, so to speak. Guys, in a relationship, aren't looking to have to work and fight for every inch of happiness. Its not a game. Getting you was a game. Convincing you that they aren't a piece of shit like everyone else was part of the game. Time and time again proving their trust was part of the game.
When the game is over, reap the rewards. Stop trying to play another game with someone who is content enjoying the spoils.
(Sorry for the extended metaphor, but in all honesty it happens alot. One person tries to make things more difficult or different because of some notion of power or whatever. And that breaks apart relationships very quickly.)