So the relationship I was in didn't really work out. I have a hard time keeping relationships working for a long period of time, and after some introspection I think it has to do with me being somewhat cold/hot. I don't show that I am interested in a guy until he shows interest in me, and then for him, there is no chase. I live by the, 'I like you, you like me and now we are together.' sort of mantra. It's just who I am, and I can't really change that nor would I want to because I'm a very commited but initially cautious sort of person. It may not be the most attractive trait that I have but if I change myself in that manner I worry that I will attract the wrong sort of person. Stay true to myself, y'know?

This spring/summer I'm going to really work on myself, inside and out, in order to shine a little more radiantly for someone. But beyond the initial attraction and first few dates, what is it that men enjoy in a long term partner? I realize everyone is different, but I'd like some ideas/tips on how to make someone happy and how to communicate what makes me happy.

What do men look for, beyond a fling?

What traits do you find attractive in a woman, starting from the superficial to the more complex ideologies of a prospective mate?