Im japanese, I have that stereotypical asian parent.
the strict over protective parent.
Heres some back ground info. I was born in japan moved to hawaii when i was 4 with my mom. my parents arnt divorced but my dad stayed in japan.
so growing up together with my mom she be always scolding me and hitting me and stuff. And honestly I thought it was normal.
Another thing thats different from a normal family excluding the fact my dad isnt there for me is that my mom doesnt work. my dad sends us money and my mom is just a housewife so she can "help me study".
So as any asian parent would do, my mom would drill me with work and studying since back as i can remember. I owe it to her like my abilities in math and stuff.
This continued on and on and on and every time i didnt get it right she would scold me "why cant you get this? this is pre algebra. This is so easy, are you dumb?" she would mock me like that I wouldve only learned the subject that day. With my moms short temper, she threw me what ever she could grab. You name it ve been thrown at (scissors, cup of water, small calculator, works, vitamin bottles, etc).
Whats weird is shes super over protective. I didnt get to sleep in my own room till the end of middle school. Ive literally never told this to anyone. Its so embarrassing. every time my friends would ask "hey kai, what size is your bed" i would always lie and be like "idk". or the fact that she would never let me use MY COMPUTER alone in my room till i was a senior. and she would constantly check what i was doing. (alt+tab ftw).
Highschool came along, I became outgoing. I started doing extracurricular activities and I realised how much im missing out and how my mom is rather different from other parents. my friends are surprised when they learn that my mom hits me or throws me shit because it never happened to them. And likewise im also kinda surprised that im the only one that was "abused". Sophmore year came and I started lashing back at my mom but everytime i would, she be like "Im gonna call the cops that my son is threatening to kill me and im scared" or pull some bullshit like that. I cant remember how many times i wanted to call the free hotline for child abuse.End of sophmore year, I met my ex and the moment i showed my mom her face she instantly started calling her names, slut, scum , cheater blah blah (she did eventually cheat on me though-.-) but after series of eventsmy mom approved of my ex and blah blah. Junior year, I take the hardest class offered at my highschool AP US History, its known the hardest because at least half of the class gets F for the first quarter. so anyways final prject of the year. Im making a diorama of Woodstock, my mom suddenly gets mad at me because it was already 6am and i didnt finished it yet so she throws a CAN OF CHILI. it hits my shoulder, the can opens, and splatters all over my diorama. I got an F. Senior year comes and its all about college apps. Idk what happened but i remembered she was mad at me one night so i go to sleep in my bed. I wake up because she threw a JUG OF MILK at my bed, splattered all over me. Srsly its not even a prank. and then she lectured me till 6 in the morning after that.
College. I find out im going to college in japan. this is where i fucked up. My parents (mom and dad) asked me if i wanted to live in a dorm or alone or with my mom. I wanted to live in a dorm to be away from my parents but my parents were against it because the dorm unlike the american ones are 40 min traain ride away from the campus. I wanted to live alone but i was scared because my japanese level back then was pretty low. I could speak but I literally couldnt read shit. So I ask my mom if she could live with me for 2 years while i get used to the change and after my sophomore year in college she will move back to where my dad lives. She promised this to me and my dad (whose been lonely recently lol).
its the end of my sophomore year in college. Ive been thru hell in japan with my mom. the place we live is pretty small. the worst part is that there isnt a legit door separating my room to her room and to the kitchen. its a flimsy sliding door. so i cant make private phone calls and my mom can still monitor my computer activities and my mom wont let me shut the door. I cant stay out overnight, she doesnt give me allowance (doesnt really matter because i never got one). and all she does is yell at me every day about something that ive heard so many times i dont even bother to listen. she still throws shit at me and everything.
another thing i messed up was last semester i fucked up school so bad i only earned 2 credits... in the whole semester...... fml right?
So my mom is using that to say how I cant move out. what the real deal is, is that my mom is born and raised in tokyo, right in the city. and where my dad is, is kyoto, a more rural and temple filled area. my mom loves tokyo and using my 2 credit disaster as a thing to tell my dad how she needs to live here.
Yea itss my fault but fuck. she started doing the paper work to renew our apartment contract.
I feel so betrayed. Ever since i came to japan i waited everyday that in 2 years i get to live at my own place and do thing my way. but no my mom crushed my dreams and everything today. I literally want to cry to the fact that i still have to live with my mom.
I know people are gonna comment how much they miss their mom and stuff. I get it. Its just we all need our time apart till we realize that its important. I havent realized it if i actually am suppose to realize it. Im at the point when people ask me "who do you love the most" and everyone is like "my mom" i cant answer mom. Ive always relied on friends because they game me more comfort than anything else in this world.
Im just fed up. any guys have any idea what I should do? let me know.
Thanks for reading if you did <3 love you guys