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Thread: Girl Advice o.o'

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    Girl Advice o.o'

    I have sorta been hung up on a ex for a long time so my love life has kinda been in a rut. Tried to have a relationship last year, didnt work, and same with a few flings. Anyways, this girl sees me at work and adds me cause she thought I was cute. So I started texting her a bit, invited her to my grad party. She couldn't come but the following night she invited me out to a bar, and called me her dancing partner and that I was missing her dance moves. We then decided today to get coffee. We hugged at the end. I thought it went pretty good, and then later on she texted me and said "I had a good time you're a good guy to hang out with"


    ..........................
    ........
    ...

    Okay. Way to be captain mysterious. Now shes pretty kinda standoffish. I can't tell if I screwed up somehow or if shes just really innocent/shy. Im not used to girls like that.

    Suggestions on what to do/go on from here?

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    I don't want to be a debbie downer but that's something I would say if I was trying to friend zone somebody.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maditude View Post
    I don't want to be a debbie downer but that's something I would say if I was trying to friend zone somebody.
    Lol so clearly I messed up somewhere along the line. Damn it, shes mega cute and seemed pretty cool.

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    Well do you like her? Do you want her?

    In my opinion, she wants you. When a girl likes you, she'll act friendly and hint she wants you to do the rest of the work.
    When she really likes you, she'll do what this girl has been doing. Which is taking you out on the town. If she wanted to friend you, she'd suggest more innocent activities than going to the bar (did you 2 grind?) and coffee, even after you fucking up your moves.

    She's just innocent/shy. If you really screwed up, she wouldn't have texted you a "happy" text about how nice it was to hang today, or something else. Even if you did, sounds like you're in if you want to be. Ask her to chill again, if she excitedly says yes, then BAM! IN THE PUSSY!

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    I disagree @Mod


    I've asked a guy out before or agreed to go out thinking it'd be awesome and gone stale after the first date, only to later utter awkward words like "you're a good guy" via text message.

    Now, I'm not trying to make Bettser feel like shit or anything lol I'm not saying she's not into him but assuming that girls that act like this totally want you is ridiculous. If you came onto me HARDER after I acted like that toward you I'd feel awkward and annoyed and giggle to my friends about you.

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    @Bettser
    omg i've been in this situation a million times with guys that say the exact same things to me. (i.e. "it's nice to have a cute friend." "i had fun hanging out with you dude " "you're nice." etc.) in this particular situation, i do agree with @Mod that it's a good thing she's taking you out to the bar, and out in public. usually if i have a guy that i just enjoy hanging out with as a friend, i invite him over to my house to play mario or something. we have to be really clear that we're just friends if i start going out to lunch/shopping/other activities with him.

    was the adventure to the bar just you two, or did she have a bunch of girlfriends with her? cuz it'd be a lot better if she invited you, and only you.

    and this is a thing girls do (including me. i know, we're awful) but sometimes if a cute guy thinks i'm cute or shows signs that he likes me, i'll go out with them somewhere and do the same thing she did. you know, call you my "dancing partner" out loud to people, hug you, etc. but if i really don't like your personality but just think you're hot, i'll more than likely just keep you around until someone better comes up.

    since this hasn't really advanced past a hug/texts, i highly doubt it's the above scenario, but it could become that. if she's been standoffish, i wouldn't worry too much about it at this point in time. give her like a day or so and then try texting her again. if she's still giving one word answers or acting uninterested, just leave her alone. one thing you shouldn't do if you're interested in her and you don't know how she feels, is hooking up with her. personally for me, hooking up with someone that i'm interested in is the kiss of death.

    as for the hug: a hug can be very intimate, or just friendly. i hug a lot of people, regardless of gender/relationship. i wouldn't read too much into that. what you need to look out for more is touching, her smile, her hands, and if she's playing with her hair, that's a huge sign that she's flirting. i know that's cliche but seriously. it's like a proven fact that a lot of girls twirl their hair when they're interested in a potential mate. also, if she's mirroring your moves, that's a good sign too! as in, if you smile and she smiles; you touch your face, she touches her face.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maditude View Post
    I disagree @Mod


    I've asked a guy out before or agreed to go out thinking it'd be awesome and gone stale after the first date, only to later utter awkward words like "you're a good guy" via text message.

    Now, I'm not trying to make Bettser feel like shit or anything lol I'm not saying she's not into him but assuming that girls that act like this totally want you is ridiculous. If you came onto me HARDER after I acted like that toward you I'd feel awkward and annoyed and giggle to my friends about you.
    These are fine wordings that depend on the girl. Some are articulate like you, some are innocent like...innocent girls. I've had that texted to me too after a night out. I didn't read it like that; even if I messed up, I kept gunning the days after. From there, if the girl says no, well at least I tried. The point is to win a girl over when the door is open, even when it starts to close.

    Regardless, it's not up to the guy to interpret an answer just like that, nor should he (who goes off 1 text and backs off?). Bettser should press on, and like I said earlier, ask to hang out again. That'll be the make or break. They've already hung out in more intimate situations than usual, it would be perfectly fine for him to ask if she wants anything more out of this.

    What I mean by "HARDER" is not to corner a girl off in an alley and drop my pants, but to be more suggestive and flirtatious in wanting to be more serious. Just give her a more solid sign that he's willing if she is.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mod View Post
    These are fine wordings that depend on the girl. Some are articulate like you, some are innocent like...innocent girls. I've had that texted to me too after a night out. I didn't read it like that; even if I messed up, I kept gunning the days after. From there, if the girl says no, well at least I tried. The point is to win a girl over when the door is open, even when it starts to close.

    Regardless, it's not up to the guy to interpret an answer just like that, nor should he (who goes off 1 text and backs off?). Bettser should press on, and like I said earlier, ask to hang out again. That'll be the make or break. They've already hung out in more intimate situations than usual, it would be perfectly fine for him to ask if she wants anything more out of this.

    What I mean by "HARDER" is not to corner a girl off in an alley and drop my pants, but to be more suggestive and flirtatious in wanting to be more serious. Just give her a more solid sign that he's willing if she is.
    I have a short attention span so I didn't read all that but.
    My advice to Bettser was to just ask her plain and simple. There's no point in trying to read a girls mind, that shit is impossible. Women appreciate men who are straight forward and don't beat around the bush, especially the ones that are too shy to say what's on their mind.
    She'll find the courage it took to ask attractive and worst case scenario she'll say "yeah lets just be friends"

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maditude View Post
    I have a short attention span so I didn't read all that but.
    My advice to Bettser was to just ask her plain and simple. There's no point in trying to read a girls mind, that shit is impossible. Women appreciate men who are straight forward and don't beat around the bush, especially the ones that are too shy to say what's on their mind.
    She'll find the courage it took to ask attractive and worst case scenario she'll say "yeah lets just be friends"
    That's what I said,

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maditude View Post
    I have a short attention span so I didn't read all that but.
    My advice to Bettser was to just ask her plain and simple. There's no point in trying to read a girls mind, that shit is impossible. Women appreciate men who are straight forward and don't beat around the bush, especially the ones that are too shy to say what's on their mind.
    She'll find the courage it took to ask attractive and worst case scenario she'll say "yeah lets just be friends"
    Madi wins, she said shes looking for friends haha.

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